Ihsan

Mom, Dad, May I Please Think For Myself?

This is my first piece of work for Ihsan and I honestly hope it's some good.

Just now, I had a 'civilized disagreement' with my mother, who wants me to take up some sort of art course for my two week break from school. While I have nothing against artistic endeavours and while I think it would be great if I did something productive in these fifteen days, arts is not my field. Painting, drawing, making flowers out of clay, etc etc, these are great talents but they're not the way I channel my creativity. I like writing more.

But she wanted me to do it and when I suggested that I take a course which I really find interesting myself and which can actually help polish whatever little skill I do have, she put on a disappointed expression and turned away.

Okay, I'm sorry, but I don't like those things. I know you do, which is why you still make flowers out of beads and wire and it's gorgeous but it's just not what I like to do. Why is it such a big deal if I choose what activity to pursue?

Taking this onto a larger scale, often my dad and my elder sisters like to gang up on me and tell me that my more progressive values regarding women's liberation and homosexuality are very wrong. They won't discuss it with me so that I can try to see what they're trying to say. They just say I'm wrong. On the rare discussions that do take place, they end up with, 'You're just a kid and you don't know anything'. Well, thank you very much but since you've given me a good upbringing and embedded your fine moral values and clear ideas of right and wrong into my mind, will you now please trust me to use that morality and those principles and make my own choices?

I'm trying to be the good little girl who does whatever her parents say and yet be true to myself. The way they act sometimes, I feel like they won't let me be the latter in peace. So in retaliation, I won't be the former.

Sigh. Does anyone see us going around in circles? Because I'm getting dizzy.

posted by Anonymous at 3/18/2005 07:20:00 PM